Currently listening to: UNFAITHFUL

I was planning on typing out some lyrics..but it kept referring to another guy's love or some shit like that, and that's just NOT how i roll. Openly anyways ;)

whatever happened to Rihanna anyhow.....when she started out she was like that girl that you assumed couldn't speak english very well, and whom would secretly enjoy a good spanking, then she slowly changed into some chick who you assumed was extremely kinky and for sure enjoyed getting beat...then into that chick who liked getting beat a little too much.

It's been so long since I have shared my highly valued opinions with you folks...
oh boy it's campaign time! That means everyone's busy....and people who NEVER talk to you will, but only to ask you to help them with campaigns.

Sigh AP's coming up...I dislike school very much. So much homework....that I never bother doing. Tehee!

New Trend: Saying FML. So ever since that website has gained some popularity within our circle of friends (hurray for them) people have been uttering this phrase. And instead of exploding, I've found a way for it to amuse me. How? By pretending it really stands for *drum roll*:

Fat Male Lover

I know, I'm so clever...tehehehe :D So you know, next time you see someone with those initials..start a convo and send them a big LMFAO

I've been sleeping VERY early everyday....but since i gotta wake up earlier it kind of cancels out...which is kinda gay. I suppose I will end this blog now....

I guess I don't really understand how conversations work....here I thought, naively, that you need more than one person to be talking. Silly me.

I am sick of this. I refuse to ever work in a group unless I have to. There are currently no words in my vocabulary that can portray the contempt, and dare I say, pure hatred, I have for the inexplicable degree of incompetence and satisfaction with mediocrity that some people seem to possess. What the fuck.

As Emily requested

okay so quick blog before I goto sleep. Haven't been sleeping enough lately...so we'll see how this goes...

Yeah, i've only been sleeping at like 12. and for some of you, that's fucking early. Well all i have to say to that is, you guys are retarded. :D

Effects of Sleep Deprivation:
1.No impulse control. You will say/do anything that comes to mind, whether it be sending a random message* to someone you barely know, or yielding to suggestions that make you look stupid. For example, going around the room in a daze look for blank paper. Which brings me to my second point! *arrow thing pointing down*
2.You fail to notice things you can potentially trip over. Like bags.
3.Dirty minded + no impulse control =....well you can guess.
4.You become unaware of your surroundings, and every situation becomes basically the same. Causing you to act the same...whether it be in a computer lab, a library, or inside my pants, but still outside the boxers.
5.You notice your developing double chin.
6.You stay up til 1 AM wasting precious time not doing shit.

Btw, HAVE FUN IN EUROPE SIENA. That's right, you're special enough to get a shout out from me :D

*No, that little star beside the word message wasn't just a stupid typo. It yields to this!

Hi you have a sexy body. I want to rub canola oil all over your thighs, but only your thighs. Oh and your biceps and trapezius muscles. I would really enjoy it if you would pretend that I was a chicken, and feed me licorice sticks. PLease do it. OMGZ I really enjoy BLACk licorice. I like to pretend that it's two really long stretched out grapes interwined. TEHEEHEHEHEHEHEHEH

which, was the silly message I sent. No wonder I don't have a girlfriend...and several restraining orders.

my eyes are so sore. too much porn?..... MAYBE.

I dropped a lead pencil on myself today, and it was fucking painful. I was bleeding. It was sad.


I've been so out of it lately...too much porn? MAYBE

I should not be on here..must go do homework. And AWAY

STRESS FREE =D
Well, until Ap exams. Then i'm dead. I got pwned by physics today...didn't bother reading what the test was on. whoops.

Girls and their lyric messages. They think they're so cool....well
(8)I fuucked a Mermaid! So confusing, I mean you try to make fun of it and then they're like "oh it's from a song" and you end up feeling like a retard.

This morning I was trying to eat this slice of orange but I kept missing and then twice orange juice almost hit me in the eye. It was fail. Oh well at least (8)I have a nautica theme pashmena afghan!

This is weird, I have no homework, and I feel empty.

Yesterday I experienced one of the most uncomfortable pees ever. I was surrounded on all sides in the urinal. It was SO FUCKING AWKWARD. Females don't experience this unlucky event.... I cringe whenever i think about it. *shrivels* It would be the equivalent of...okay well imagine pulling out your vagina while being next to two girls who also pull out their vaginas. Exactly.
Actually, that's kinda hot. ;)

Why does dammit not have an N in it?

What the hell am I talking about??

I JIZZ IN MY PANTS (8)

Metal smells really bad; such as paper clips. Gross. \

I open a window and I...you know =)

These videos are so awesome that i'm willing to sacrifice the neatness of my blog to display them:

YES one more follower. At this rate i'll be famous in no time =D

Okay quick update before i go cry myself to sleep...
It's the end of the term, and for the second time in less than a month I am plagued by insane amounts of work. That's right...INSANE. Everyday I go home and i study/hwk, leaving maybe an hour to eat and other random stuff. And yet i am still not accomplished anything. *sigh* Oh well.

I got some very strange looks today. One was from my socials teacher, when he asked me what class i had then. I told him: Dance. His response: Dance??!

The other time was today in lit class (Oh no i'm revealing so much information...i hope i do'nt get stalked), and i had to go washroom. We have a hall pass...and it's a pink plastic flamingo. So i dragged that thing in to the washroom, and saw two other guys there, and they just looked at me like i was fucking out of my mind. Probably just jealous because my man package is so abnormally big. =D I feel like i shouldn't be on the copmuter right now......cuz i really don't deserve this break. Homework.....away!

IT'S BEEN A WHILE!
currently swamped by homework....mainly chem. What a Horrible course. For some odd reason this chapter is especially hard for me...which is pretty retarded considering it's actually really easy. Does that make sense? It should.

I was recently introduced to a snack called Corntos. They are fucking delicious. But what really got me was the amazing product description on the back:

"Once you've tasted Corntos, there's no going back. It reveals a new pleasure you never would've thought possible. Call it excitement. Call it sheer thrill. Call it anything you want. Corntos opens you to a new world of flavours. It's an experience that you'll want to enjoy over and over again. Corntos. Try it, you'll see the light."

And it keeps it's word. It gave me a mouth orgasm.

moving on....really don't feel like going back to studying. Ah, and the AP exam coming up soon- the fun just doesn't stop.

That's fantastic. It's nice when you're proud of something, but it turns out to be shit.

Getting brain-raped by chemistry. Trying to learn one chapter in 4 hours is not a good idea.

But on the bright side, here's something we've all been looking forward to (btw you can watch a HD version if you click it):

Bromance.

I saw this show on MTV the other day...and wow. I have to say, television has really reached it's zenith. The show is just pure genius. I mean, it's like The Bachelor (and all it's ripoffs), but with all guys! Okay so for those of you who aren't up to date on all that's hip and cool, I'll elaborate. The show is a spin-off of The Hills which is a spin-off of Laguna Beach - a dumbed down version of The OC. Well anyways, the premise of this show is that this guy needs a new best friend, or "bro". How will he accomplish this? Like any other celebrity ofcourse; through a series of challenges and test that will truly reveal a strangers personality and intentions, after which the celebrity in question will finally able to find a true and trustworthy friend with whom he can spend the rest of eternity with drinking beers and oggling chicks. Oh and don't forget, that friend's goals for being on the show is obviously neither fame nor fortune, but purely to find an everlasting "Bromance".

First and foremost, how do Brody's real friends feel? I wouldn't be too happy if suddenly one (out of my vast array) of friends just woke up one day and decided, "Hey, I don't really enjoy hanging out with you anymore so I think I'm going to find a new friend". Secondly, even the winner is still a loser. He will have obviously abandoned his own friends as well, not to mention that he'll be forever known as Brody's Bitch. Well okay he probably won't be known very much, as his fifteen minutes will run it's due course, and eventaully he's descend back into obscurity. He'll probably return back to his old life with his ego inflated, thinking he's the shit since he got to tag along a celebrity. He'll walk around, thinking (even a little bit) that his life has been somehow enriched through this meager experience. Little does he know, that celebrity will probably have a second season (as these shows always do), and the winner's name will mean nothing more than straight porn to Lance Bass. Lastly, there is that little Asian guy they have on the show. He's so stereotypically Asian: Glasses, short,scrawny, kind of nerdy and easily pushed around. You know that they're just keeping him around to keep the viewers guessing, and to demonstrate how anybody can have a chance. But really, we all know that little asian guy's screwed.

If you're channel surfing and you happen to come across this show, I highly suggest taking a peek - I'm sure it will change your life in many profound, and wonderful ways.

More Things that Annoy Me (sick and out of it)

1.Crappy Stationary.
i)Sandy ass paper that make your writing all leady(yes i know that's not a word, but i'm sure you all know what I mean).
ii)Shitty ass lead that either breaks with the slightest pressure or they're so thick and it makes your writing all smudged and shit. (this might be the first time i can say that "all smudged and shit" is a better adjective...fail =D)
iii)Erasers that don't erase properly. You either end up smudging your paper or trying extra hard to erase and lo and behold, you've ripped your paper. Also, those erasers that claim they erase pen. Have you manufacturers actually tried it? No, they don't erase pen. Unless you count denting your paper and leaving a hole where the ink use to be erasing.
iv)Lead pencils that fall apart. The pencil clip breaks within the first few days. The grip begins to deteriorate at an abnormal pace. The lead pencil stops dispensing lead.
v)rulers that aren't accurate. OKay these things are a goddamn piece of metal/wood/plastic. The only thing separating this from a goddamn piece of metal/wood/plastic is the little tiny markings on it, which you would expect to be accurate. And yet, many rulers in the world have uneven divisions. How does that happen? The one little thing you have to do, you fuck up on.
I'm not a perfectionist. I just don't enjoy shit.
2.Magicians and Comedians who claim that for sure this "is not staged or set up and 100% real" or that they "did not make this shit up and it actually happened". Honestly? HONESTLY!?!? It totally crushes one's faith in humanity...=(
3.Spoof movies. Well it isn't so much annoying as i just don't care. I would hardly call piecing together a bunch of random scenes with quaint references a movie. And I swear. Half the audience who goes to see those movies goes for the obligatory hot girl they place in there; ie, male teens whose balls just dropped and haven't discovered any good porn sites yet.
4.Walking around your house for like five minutes and then realizing the thing you're looking for was in the place that you first started.
5.Going to do something, and end up getting distracted and forgetting what you originally planned. Oh wait that's procrastination.
6.Cordless phones. Why do these not have a keypad lock or something that prevents you from accidentally hanging up on someone on account of the fact that you're putting the goddamn phone on your shoulder.
7. Sales people in stores. It's like sharks smelling blood. The moment you walk in, they come up to you and stalk you down. Even when you've politely told them that you don't need any help, they stand there mindlessly as if you're too incompetent to ask when you do need assistance. I said i didn't need help, not, "wait there like a fucking manakin and stare creepily at me for an hour."
8.Electronics that shut down because you have "low battery". What use is that? No, see you shut down when you have no battery. That's like, if you were starving and you only had 20 dollars left and you say "oh i'm not going to eat because i have only a little bit money left". But who am i to tell how an electronic should act.

"Who the hell looked at a pineapple and thought it was a good idea to eat it" -Cyanide & Happiness, 01.28.2009

Man my writing skills have really gone to pieces. Must, Write, More.

Okay so so far there hasn't been anything funny...but i swear the blogs'll pick up. hopefully. and if not, i could always start posting guides about measuring stuff.
meanwhile, here's a a little something about something very special to me:

Oh showerhead. How i love you so
with your three water settings of painful, mildly painful, and pansy
yes, i'll admit it, i'm a pansy type of person.
the painful is just too, well painful.
besides, when you want to wash down there, it's quite unpleasant;
kind of like sand paper. but i'm getting off topic
Why do i not use mildy painful? because,
mildly painful is for indecisive faggots.
i'm sorry that was uncalled for. what was i talking about again? oh right
anyways, i especially love how stiff you are.
Unlike other showerheads i've used, whom
don't stay on the fucking hook thing. and when
you raise it, they fall back down like an old person
with erectcile disfunction. I love vaginas.
Lastly, i must commend you on your foresight.
you know just when some asshole has flushed the toilet
or turned on the sink, and you let me know
with your shrill whistling, that i'm about
to get burned like a motha fucka (i know im' not gangster.)
You give me just the right amount of time for me
to hop away before i am scorched, charred, seared, burnt, singed, branded, cauterized, blistered, scalded, parched.
and for that, I thank you.

Soporific. (i'm not grammatically retarded, I swear)

"This town deserves a better class of [bloggers], and I'm gonna give it to them"
- The Joker...sort of.

wowee. two posts in just ONE day? you know that following this blog is going to be one exciting adventure! Or i just have no life. I think we all know which one it is.

lesson of the day: mephitic is spelt with two i's

why is there even an option to "watch in high quality" on youtube?
who would willingly chose to watch in normal quality?